Stay at home mum myths

I am currently month three in my new career as a stay at home mum and I've got to be honest anyone who aspires to this is crazy! It is without a doubt the hardest job I have ever had in my life.....it is relentless. Of course there are the positives and I will get to experience lots of lovely things and that is great. However there are also a lot of things that I miss and the assumptions that people make about stay at home parents really do make me laugh. Mainly because I used to think the exact same thing!

Well here I am ready to blow them out of the water for you....

1. It is better than being at work

I used to think this (cringe) and was jealous of my SAH friends. However I now don't get sick leave, annual leave or a lunch break. I'm not even allowed to use the toilet alone. I  have completely stopped shutting the door when I go to the toilet as my one year old proceeded to stand outside and bang the door demanding he see me throughout my trip to the porcelin throne.

2.  I sit around all day watching daytime TV

I actually miss out on watching daytime TV because I am either out of the house entertaining the kids or the in house babysitter, CBeebies is looking after them whilst I attempt some chores.

3.  I can be flexible because I don't have a job

Each day is run like a military operation, with two kids under school age I can't be flexible just because I don't have a job. If it's not meal time, it's snack time. If they're not eating they need to nap. If they're not napping I am at a play group, music class, sports class or at a playdate.

4. I can have a lie in because I don't have to clock in at work

My day starts at 6.30am same way it used to when I was at work. In fact when I was on a late shift and the kids were in childcare I could have a lie in!! I now have to set an alarm so I can be up, showered and dressed for the kids when they wake. After their 12 hour sleepathon they wake up with more energy than Davina Mccall and I have to be ready for them and their endless demands.

5. My day ends when the kids are in bed

Nope wrong again! The problem with always being at home is that I'm not "allowed" to let the household chores slip. Before when I ran off to work I knew the cleaner would be working her magic or I could ignore all the other chores that needed doing. After the kids are in bed I then have to prepare the forth meal of the day, dinner for myself and my husband (Unfortunately I married for love instead of culinary flare). Then I have to recover the house for the next groundhog day and so the cycle continues.

6. I go to pilates and drink coffee with my friends all day

If only! It is solely me looking after the kids. Both sets of grandparents live 90 minutes away and one set are still in full time employment. So it's me and the kids that's it! I don't have anyone to watch the children so I can go to pilates or to get my hair done (I have a head full of grey hairs to prove this). When I meet with friends I always end up drinking a cold stale coffee and have numerous unfinished conversations whilst we take turns in dealing with tantrums, sharing issues or running around trying to control the herd of children.

7. I am happy that I stopped working

Definitely not. I worked very hard to get to the position I was in and really enjoyed working part time. 3 days a week was perfection, I got dressed up in heels, wore makeup, did my hair and had adult conversation ALL DAY LONG! Don't get me wrong the job was stressful with a lot of pressure and long hours however hardwork was recognised and acknowledged. Now I have to beg for a thank you or quiz the boys as to whether they like the recipes I've spent 2 hours cooking.

8. I am happy to be used as a childminder 

Some friends have taken to using me as free childcare. Now to clarify, I love the kids having playdates because I get to see my friends and with that comes adult conversation. When my working friends visit I now see them taking sneaky glances at the family calendar to try and see when I will be available for hire. The phone calls requesting to drop kids off to my house has over taken the volume of PPI calls I receive.

9. I am the perfect Stepford Wife

My mum will tell you I was born messy! My house is not immaculate it very much looks lived in and you know when you enter that I have children! I don't get excited by laundry and cleaning - it's not 1920 I don't see why I should! Unfortunately my kids have inherited my messy gene and have a superhero ability to demolish a room in seconds.

10. I talk like a children's TV presenter and love playgroups

I have pretty much been to every baby and toddler group going. I've sung every nursery rhyme and read every child's book in the library. Three years in and this has got old.......I definitely do skip pages in their story books after i've been asked to read it for the 100th time and only go to playgroups to see my mates. The worst part is I've just added another 5 years to this sentence as I'm about to have to do it all over again with baby number 3! Help!



So there you are, being a stay at home mum is not what I thought it would be! But then when I was a working mum I felt like I was missing out on precious time with the kids. So whether you stay at home, work from home or have to go into the office its all hardwork and never ending. When do we get the award for working our butts off that's what I want to know!

Must dash I'm booked into Pilates at noon!